Standardized Testing

What kind of teacher blog would this be without the trials and tribulations of STAR testing?

We began our journey yesterday, and what an adventure it was. Here are a few things I think they should include in the scripted portion of the test:

"Be sure to use the bathroom before we begin."
"No seriously, go to the bathroom."
"Did everyone use the bathroom, even if you don’t have to, you need to go try."
"You cannot leave during the test."
"You cannot leave to go to the bathroom during the test."
"You need to sit in YOUR seat, at YOUR desk, and you need to be QUIET."
"No you cannot use the bathroom."
"I don’t care who farted."
"Please stop laughing, I know it stinks."
"I realize you are done, however you need to stay in YOUR seat, at YOUR desk and you need to be QUIET."
"You cannot leave to go to the bathroom."
"Really you need to be quiet."
"The more disruptive you are the longer it will take for the class to finish, and the longer you’ll have to wait until you can use the bathroom. "

I’m going to enclose these suggestions when I mail back the tests. I sure hope they can incorporate them for next year.